A Different World
A Different World
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Columban Lay Missionary, |
I arrived in Pakistan for the first time in 1994. After four months of language study which was also the beginning of my immersion into the culture, I was happy and excited to explore more deeply my new world.
One time, I took a bus from the station where there was a really big rush. In the pushing and shoving, I found myself in the front seat beside a young pregnant woman seated beside the driver. Actually the front seats are one of the few designated seats for women in public buses. After travelling about 2 kms, the bus was stopped by three men in green turbans who ordered those of us in the front seats to get off because they wanted our seats.
After a very brief discussion and some chaos in the bus, the husband of the woman beside me got off the bus and signaled to the woman to get off. I stopped her and insisted that they couldn’t just do that to us. In the first place we got the seat first, secondly she was pregnant, and we all knew it would be hours in the blazing summer heat of Pakistan, before they could get another bus from the place where we had stopped. Staring at me in surprise all she said was "I’m a Muslim. He is my husband." I insisted on keeping my seat which caused a big uproar among the passengers. The men too insisted on getting on the bus. The driver was very sympathetic to me but seemed unable to stop them. For my own safety I opted to pretend not to understand the language.
Then a very kind-looking woman who was seated behind me spoke to me and asked if I was a foreigner and if I understood what people were saying and what was going on? That people were saying I should know my place as a woman in an Islamic society. That some passengers were angry with me and even called me "faqir", which could mean "immoral. I answered yes to all her questions and asked her to tell the people that I had the right to keep my seat and that I was not getting off the bus. This caused an even greater uproar among the passengers, and arguments and discussions continued as the bus took to the road again.
A typical bus in the southern desert areas of Pakistan.
Initially, I felt very confused especially when I was told that this is what Islam is all about with regards to women. Confused, because this had not been my experience or my understanding of women-in-Islam in the Philippines. Suddenly I felt I didn’t know anything anymore. In a short span of time my confusion turned to anger. I was afraid too, not knowing what those three men who insisted on sitting in the front with me were capable of doing. I was pretty sure if those men had harassed me further, all the other passengers would point the finger at me and say "serves you right because you don’t know your place as a woman; you got what you asked for." I didn’t know where the whole experience was going and where it would lead me to.
I was born and grew up in an environment where Muslims and Christians used to live closely and in constant interaction with each other. My parents used to be teachers in a private school which had many Muslim pupils. At the same time my father was editor of a local newspaper owned and published by a family close to and very much associated with the Muslims. In social functions where I used to tag along with my parents or in gatherings at home, as a child, I saw Muslim women socialising and being held in high regard. In my experience women, Christian and Muslim, were never treated as second-class citizens.
So going back to that day in the bus I was happy enough to have caused a discussion especially among the female passengers who ended up divided on the issue of the treatment of women in Islam. After I shared my experience with the other lay missionaries and the Columban priests in Lahore, we began a more serious and urgent reflection on our lifestyles and forms of witnessing in an Islamic society. Furthermore, I found growing within me a genuine and great enthusiasm to learn more about Islam and Christianity in the Pakistani context, as well as the socio-economic, cultural and political reality of Pakistan. Eventually, I decided to leave the Columban Lay Mission House and rented a room in a community where I was able to live closely with the Christian and Muslim families.
What was difficult was that I had a completely different upbringing, which I felt was radically challenged at that moment, but it helped me realise that nothing can really prepare us fully as we plunge into any new reality. I just had to actually experience it, to be able to understand the new reality, to learn to be more open and to adjust to it. I realised I had to go through the painful task of assessing, re-assessing and re-evaluating my own beliefs, values and understanding of Islam. It was a process, slow and painful at times yet very life-giving.
Aurora is a long-term Columban lay missionary. She has served several terms on mission in Pakistan and is just completing a term as a member of the Coordinating Committee of Columban Lay Missionaries.